Aagh! The first thing I saw when I stepped into the shower this morning were stretch marks – tiger striped across the top of my abdomen. I noticed a tiny little red spot on Saturday, but then it disappeared yesterday, only to be replaced by angry little stripes this morning.

Luckily a good spray with the Body Shop papaya oil (not as icky as moisturiser) soon sorted them out. But apparently I’d grown in the night. Or rather Madam has grown. Thought she was kicking about more than usual.

I can’t possibly get any bigger. I’m starting to waddle and even walking to the bus stop is an epic journey.